Being a father with an only son among daughters is a unique family experience. On this episode of Moppet Dadsperience, we try to find out from Aremu Azeez, a father and Public Servant, what it is like to have only one son among daughters.
How many kids do you have and how old are they?
I have three kids – A boy and two girls. The boy is 8, the first girl is 6 and the last girl is a year plus old.
How do you feel having an only son?
Thank God it happened the way it did. I’ve always seen the girl child as the maker of the home. From my own perspective, they’re very productive. Not as if boys are not, but I prefer more girls to boys.
How close are you to all your kids?
We are very close and we are friends. We share things together.
Is there any difference in closeness between your only son and your daughters?
Not really! Only that in a home, as kids begin to grow, they tend to withdraw to themselves as they understand life. But notwithstanding, I’m very close to all my children. There is no difference in closeness to any of them.
How does the society respond to the fact that you have an only son?
Times are changing and nobody cares anymore that you don’t have a male child or you have only one. It’s not a big issue in my immediate society; It has been overtaken by other events.
Do you wish you have another son?
I’m good with the kids I have now. That ‘wishing’ is another thing entirely. This current composition for me is what I’ve always desired.
How do you relate with him and raise him? What values do you instill in him?
I want him to have more values than I had while growing up. I want him to fear God, be a good citizen, respecting elders, and be industrious. I make him understand that he should have respect for women.
How do your daughters treat/relate with him?
They see him as a big brother, and he tries to play that role very well. They are always good with him and play with him.
How does he relate with your daughters?
He is more of a big brother to my girls. In his own capacity, he tries to learn the things we teach him and practicalize them with the girls.
Any issue of sibling rivalry between them?
They are smart enough to take their positions at home. They’re still growing and learning the home politics. My son knows that the sisters can easily come to me and get some stuff. He always tries to reach out to me in his own way.
Do you and your spouse give any special treatment to your son? If yes, do let us know.
We don’t give any of them any special treatment.
What message do you have for parents with only one son?
I would advise that there shouldn’t be any preferential treatment to any child. I would advise that you treat children equally. It has always been that in most homes where there is an only son, the boy would be pampered. All children are from God. Provide a level playing field for them to see their best in later years.